When I got to mom this morning, she was lying flat on the bed and a bit panicked and annoyed with it. She saw me and exclaimed, “Will you help me please?!!! Where were you???!!!” I apologized for not being there sooner and gently said, “Don’t be angry with me—I’m hurrying to get here as soon as I can.” Mom said, “I’m not angry—I guess I’m just panicky because I don’t like lying flat and they didn’t give me the call button.” WOW! What a conversation to have!! So clear, cognizant, relevant!!! Mom also said she felt slightly nauseous too---this is from that Cipro (antibiotic) and taking it on an empty stomach.
I set mom up for breakfast next. Mom ate really well and quickly too. At one point, she wanted to open the container of milk. She grabbed the cardboard container and spread the first of the folds open. Next, she tried to open it to a pour position but couldn’t. Though I was tempted to jump in and open it for her, I waited and watched her out of the corner of my eye, pretending I didn’t notice her dilemma. She put the container down and decided to read the instructions: “PUSH UP. Hmmm…I did that already I think. Now what?!! PUSH UP. I did that.” She picks the container back up and she tried to push up again. She put the container down and grabbed her butter knife. She holds the knife in her hand, staring at the container, contemplating her next move. She puts the knife down and reads, “PUSH UP” one more time and grabs the container and says, “But I did that already and it won’t open.” She is talking to herself throughout this whole process. Self-talk is an important strategy to use in problem-solving, among other things. Mom finally gave up and asked, “Can you open this for me please?” I said I would but I merely showed her what to do next, telling her, “You squeeze on either side now like this, and it will open.” She watched and said, “Oh yeah. Why doesn’t it say that in the directions?” Good point. Perhaps she can write a letter and suggest this to the company.
Mom ate an omelet, a piece of plain wheat bread, bacon, oatmeal with cinnamon and apple sauce, and drank coffee, OJ and prune juice. She read the milk carton the whole time she ate and commented on where it was pasteurized and asked whether there actually is a Rabbi present during the process of making a food kosher!! Mom’s dad, my “Papa City” (he and Grammy lived in the City—Brooklyn—so we distinguished them from our other grandparents who lived on Long Island by calling them, “Nonny and Papa City.” Any way, Papa City was an AVID reader!!! He was continually surrounded by books, always. Mom reminds me of him now—she is ALWAYS reading. She loves to read. She reads magazines, newspapers, worksheets, posters on the wall, and all environmental print like on boxes and containers. “How do you ADD vitamins to milk?” Mom asks me this morning as she reads her milk carton. It’s so amazing to watch, as we grow older, the natural progression backwards to our preschool “wonder years” when everything fascinates and intrigues us. Mom is like that a bit now. It’s a nice place for her to be. A place where she now has the time to ponder such questions.
Mom and I worked with the IPAD next. We used an APP (this is a game) where there was a picture of the forest. In the forest, there were some animals that you could see clearly, but there were also other animals whose outlines were all that you could see. The outlined animals were represented in solid white. You had to touch a solid white animal and then a new screen appears with the solid white animal on one side—but now the animal, though still solid white, had puzzle shapes traced on it. On the opposite side from the white animal outline, are puzzle pieces of the actual color animal. You have to match the shape of the puzzle piece to an outlined shape on the white animal outline. Mom had a lot of difficulty with this. She couldn’t see the parts that made the whole. She has difficulty with this concept--- Parts = a Whole. She sees the whole of something…but not its parts. At times, mom was able to determine which piece went where on the animal body, but when she got close to placing the piece on the animal—she had a hard time moving her finger in the direction she was thinking about moving it. For example, if she moved a piece close to where it belonged but then needed to move the piece up a bit, she would move right or left or down instead. Also, even when there was only one piece left and one spot to put it in, mom still couldn’t see the spot on the whole where the piece went. As I watched mom with this activity, it dawned on me again that she had a hard time moving her right hand to the left side!!! This is a pattern with her. She has total control when she moves her right hand up, down or right, but she can’t move her hand to the left!! She even asked, at one point, if she could turn the IPAD around so that she could move the piece to the left side, asking, “Can I turn this around?” Nonetheless, mom persisted in calmly and patiently trying to place the pieces in the correct spot. After trying to do the second puzzle, mom finally said, “Oh I don’t know how to do this one” so I completed the puzzle. Once it was completed (it was a turtle), mom looked at the finished product and said, “Oh my God! Look at that! Give me another one to do. How do I get another one?”
The CNAs came in just then to get mom dressed. They brought her to the toilet using the serita. Mom is so much more mobile!!! WOW! She grabbed the arms of the serita and stood with hardly any help! And she stood 97% straight up!! Mom asked if she had PT today and was disappointed that she didn’t. The CNA told mom that mom could still do exercises and lead her in a quick rendition of “Hand Up, Baby Hands Up!” Mom participated well and sang very loudly.
I forgot to mention yesterday that, as mom spoke on the phone to family and friends, she kept telling them, “I’m here in a NURSING HOME for OLD PEOPLE!!! Can you believe it?!!!” She would half laugh, half complain as she said it.
Dad and I talked a lot last night about getting ready for mom’s return home. I thank the Lord for mom’s progress. Who would have believed we would have this conversation? We will be getting some detailed information about how much help we can get at home for mom. Her inability to walk is the only hindrance preventing her from coming home right now. We need to find out how long an aide will come stay at mom and dad’s house with her each day. We need to get a ramp for the back door. We need to make sure the house fits a wheelchair down each hallway and in each area of the house.
There have been no diaper or towel deliveries here at the facility for the past 2 days. I called down to the front desk to ask for these supplies. Had I not called, they would not have delivered them. As it was, they brought no towels and they only brought diapers to mom and no one else. What happens to people who have no family members to advocate for them?
Dad said that Terry told him mom was not in bed last night until about 9:15. They make her wait later and later to be put to bed for some reason. We don’t have preferential treatment upstairs like we did downstairs, at least not on the night shift. Terry also said that mom’s old roommate (the nice lady) came in to visit with mom last night and talk with her at bedtime. Terry left them both talking once mom was in bed.
After mom was dressed, she asked me to put her makeup on and do her hair. She continued working on the IPAD puzzles and reading the wall behind her bed and snacking on some FIBER ONE cereal as she did so. When she finished her snack, I told her we’d go for a walk to visit her friends in the old vent unit she had been on. She scolded me and told me to leave the people there alone because they are busy working!!
Anthony Michael, Sammy, Con and Anthony came to see mom next. They gathered around her and talked. Then they took mom outside in the sun. They sat and talked for a while and then they walked mom all around the building in the wheelchair. Anthony Michael said that mom really enjoyed this and looked at all the plants and flowers and trees. They went inside to eat lunch then and the CNAs showed them all how mom uses the serita lift so well. They all were amazed!! Mom had turkey, stuffing and carrot cake for lunch and loved it. She watched TV and took a brief nap after lunch.
Mom's friends, Florence, Maureen, and Flo came to see her just as Anthony, Con and the kids were leaving. Dad joined them too. They all had a good time laughing and talking. Mom and dad are so lucky to have such dear, true friends. In so many similar circumstances, people lose their friends because your life stands still and comes to a halt while the lives of your friends march forward on.
Terry came to visit mom this afternoon and dad stayed to put mom to sleep tonight.
"Your Father already knows your needs. He will give you all you need from day to day." Luke 12:30-31
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